Almost as soon as a couple becomes engaged, they go online or visit their favorite department store to create their gift registry. By the time they walk down the aisle, they have a home fully stocked with new small appliances, dinnerware and linens.
What happens to all those items if the couple decides to divorce? They often don’t want anything that reminds them of their broken marriage.
What is a divorce registry?
A divorce registry lists items you may need to rebuild your life. It really isn’t much different than a wedding or baby registry. All three represent a life transition. Creating the list is practical and a symbolic step as you start the next chapter of your life. The items on your list can include essentials such as bath towels, pots and pans, and self-care items like cozy throws and candles.
There are several reasons why you may want to consider creating a divorce registry, such as:
- Starting over after a divorce can be expensive, especially when combined with the financial strain of the divorce itself.
- It gives your friends and family a tangible way to show you their care and support.
- It can help remove the stigma often associated with divorce.
Creating a divorce registry has a couple of drawbacks, such as some people perceiving it as a gift grab. This can be avoided by only sharing it with those closest to you or if anyone asks if there is anything they can do to help. You can explain that the registry is part of the healing process.
You can also break your list down into “need to have” and “be nice to have”. Some people may want to gift you with items that could be considered indulgent and luxurious.
A divorce registry is about reclaiming your independence and celebrating resilience. But the choice to create one is deeply personal. You may feel uncomfortable asking for gifts after your breakup or find it empowering and practical.